Torn

Yesterday we received a phone call from the high school. DD2 was not in trouble ;0).  No, it was one of those automatic-dialed, pre-recorded calls that they use nowadays to get information out to parents.

Even so, after listening to it, I immediately felt inner turmoil.  I'll try to sum up the call.

Basically, it was informing all us parents that the high school this year is joining up with some organized thing sort of like a food bank.  They are having a food drive--to last all school year--and the items collected will be divvied up between needy families in our school district.

That is all well and good.  Yes, I would like to help the needy in my community.  It is a small community, and there seems to be, from what I have observed through my ten years here, a large percentage of low income and poverty-level families.  So of course I'd like to help my fellow citizens who are struggling.

Except, and here's where the turmoil comes in, the food drive is only for non-perishable food items, and the phone call informed me that specifically macaroni and cheese, Ramen noodles, breakfast bars, instant oatmeal packets, granola bars, family sized cans of soup are desired.  The goal is to, on a weekly basis, provide each needy family with 3 days of dinner and breakfasts on the weekends.

Hmm.  I don't buy that stuff for my own family.  Ramen noodles I wouldn't eat if I was starving (tried them once, and they will never pass my lips again).  Mac and cheese boxes don't go very far, not nearly as far as a box of elbow macaroni and a jar of cheese sauce, which together cost only about double what the name brand box of mac and cheese goes for, but makes at least four times as many servings.

So, while I would love to feed all the hungry children of my school district, I don't want to feed them that stuff.  I'd much rather donate pasta, jars of sauce, the dinner mixes that I make and sell at the farmers market, homemade oatmeal packets, the same dry soup mixes (just add water) that I make for use at home instead of buying cans of creamed soups. . .   But that stuff is not what is wanted.  That stuff is a) questionable because it didn't come from a store and factory sealed, and b) takes too much effort to cook.

I'm torn.  I can't quite bring myself to go to the store and purchase the requested items.  Not just because I know there are cheaper alternatives.  Not just because I know there are healthier alternatives.  Not just because I know that scooping out a 1/2 cup of powdered soup mix and adding water then heating doesn't take much more effort and time than opening a can of soup, adding water and heating.

Yet, my help is not wanted if I instead donate all the homemade equivalents to those items.  And I don't want my donation to be tossed into the trash instead of being eaten by the hungry.

I'm torn.

What I wish could happen is that I could be partnered with a family in need.  That I could deliver to them some of the fresh bounty from my garden on a week to week basis.  That I could mentor the parent (or even middle school and up aged children, maybe it is even more important to mentor the children) on meal preparation.  That I could show them that cooking isn't a burden.  That all food doesn't have to be taken from a box and put into the microwave in order to have a quick meal when you are short on time.  To teach them to prioritize their time and that a half hour spent cooking is much more important than a half hour in front of the television.  To give them my homemade maple syrup in the spring and share my pancake recipe with them (I'd even provide the flour, sugar, salt, baking powder and vegetable oil for it too). To give them fresh eggs when I have them coming out my ears in the spring and early summer.  To give them asparagus in May when we are eating it almost daily.  To give them fresh chicken when I butcher my broilers, and fresh venison in November.

Lest I be accused of not knowing what it feels like to be in the shoes of a parent who works at minimum wage all week and comes home exhausted, not having time to cook a good meal, let me say "Yes, I do."  I have been there, and then some. And what I learned was cooking from scratch.  What I learned was that feeding myself and my kids was just as important as bringing home the paycheck that bought the food, and certainly more important than the time to watch one more tv show.  I learned that planning ahead doesn't take much time or effort, and whipping up a casserole the night before and putting it in the fridge to cook the next day when I have a shift that runs later isn't as much of a burden as getting off work and wondering if I have enough cash to pick up a drive-through dinner for my family on my way home.  I learned that fancy haircuts were not important compared to feeding my kids.  I learned that going to a movie was a want, not a need.

Okay, I'll stop now because I can feel this quickly turning into a rant on how many people spend their money instead of on food for their family.  I'll just add that when there was $45 in the budget to buy a weeks worth of groceries for five of us, my family did not eat out, we didn't order pizza, and DH did not buy beer even though he really would have loved to have beer after a long day's work.  We bought ingredients, and cooked them.  And our family was nourished, no child in my house ever went hungry, and every child drank milk.

So, I'm torn.  I want to help.  But the way in which I know there will be the most benefit is not how the help is being accepted.