A Month of Grandkids

Actually, its been nearly five weeks.  With the exception of weekends, a couple of days over New Year's, and a much needed week's vacation for DH and I, the grandkids have been living with us for over a month now.  Some of that time, they were dropped off on a Sunday night and not picked up again until DS1 got off work on Friday afternoon.  But then DH and I objected to this schedule, pointing out that in families where both parents work, children only see their parents from after work until bedtime most weekdays, so why couldn't they go home from the time DS1 got off work until bedtime each night. So, for the past few weeks the kids got several hours a day at home with their parents before returning to our house for bedtime. 

This afternoon, they went home, presumably to stay. 

I have mixed feelings about that.  I'm whupped, and am glad for a break. To say its been tough caring for children and doing the multiple times a day school run (3-day-a-week 1/2-day preschool and 5-day all-day Kindergarten) on top of trying to do my own job (and shuffling my work hours mornings some days,  late afternoon others) is an understatement. I'm also glad that the kids can sleep in their own beds at night and play with their own toys.  On the other hand, this returning home is a disruption to the predictable schedule that DH and I had developed for them, and I'm hoping the change wont be too traumatic.  I hope the progress K3 made in school during her time with us won't come to a stop, putting her behind again in Kindergarten. Also, on that other hand, I'm not sure how long this will last.  After all, it was roughly a month between when they went home the last time and when events transpired to make it necessary for them to return to our care.  All that up and down, back and forth is hard on young ones.  They were convinced, when they first came back in December, that they had done something to make their parents send them away.  And you can't exactly tell small children that a parent has problems which is the real reason they couldn't be at home when Daddy isn't there.

This is so, so hard.  I wouldn't wish mental health and substance issues on any family.  It's emotionally draining. It hurts so bad to see your loved ones go through it.  It is also physically exhausting being the helper and the refuge for the little ones.  Spiritually I go back and forth between praying for Gods Will to be done, and telling Him how I think the situation should be resolved.  I also find it impossible, as time goes on, not to take a side.  I am on the side of the grandchildren.


On the positive side, it has been nice to spend extra time with the grandkids.  Its been really nice to do things with them that get overlooked at home, given the turmoil in that house.  And, most times, the kids were able to go outside and play if they wanted to, even in the most 'rotten' cold weather.

a single digit high temperature day

If you don't mind a huge mess, you should try two small kids, a box large enough to sit in, and a shopping bag full of packing peanuts.  It was hours of fun (and double the hours to clean up!).