Frugal February #13: Hand Me Downs and Hand Me Ups

Hand me downs.  What was your gut reaction when you read that phrase?  "Oh, yay!"?  Or "I hate them."?

Hand me downs are one of those things that people either love or hate.  It's all in how you look at them.  Are they an insult, a glaring neon sign that says "You're too poor to buy new stuff; you have to wear somebody else's old clothes"?  Or are they a gift that says "Now you can put the money you would have had to spend on this item toward a higher priority"?

When I was very young, I loved hand me downs.  A bag of clothes from the revered older neighbor girl was like receiving a Christmas present any time of the year.  As I got older, however, my attitude swayed more to the "I'm ashamed; they think I'm poor" side of things.  Especially as I had my first child and really needed those hand me downs that various people offered me for him, I felt like I was somehow lacking by not being able to buy brand new stuff for my son.

Then I got in touch with my frugal persona, the one who saw those hand me downs as a tool instead of a kick me sign. Hand me downs weren't an insult, they were a blessing.  I could take the money I saved and use it on more pressing things, like food or utilities.  Or, occasionally, for splurges like taking him to the zoo or other fun things. Not downtrodden, but empowered!

By the time I had two kids, I realized that hand me downs not only saved me money now, they also had the potential to keep saving  me money for years.  For instance, a hand me down winter coat for DS1, if kept in good shape, could be saved after he outgrew it and used again for DS2.  Savings now, savings later! 

Hand me ups, I'm betting you've never heard of before.  I like to think I coined that phrase.  At least, I don't consciously remember ever hearing the term 'hand me up' before it came out of my mouth about 12 years ago in reference to a big bag of winter clothing I was given by a younger cousin who was moving to Florida.  While growing up, she had received all my outgrown-but-in-good-shape clothing since we were the only two girls in the family.  Now that we were adults, and in the same size, she passed along to me the cold weather clothing she wouldn't have a use for in that subtropical climate she was relocating to.

By definition, then, a hand me up is something you receive from a younger relative or friend.  Get it?  Hand me down goes down the line in age, hand me up comes up from someone younger. 

Hand me ups are cool.  Especially those that you can plan in advance.  Like when DD1 hit her middle school growth spurt and I realized she would soon be wearing the same size footwear as me.  With luck (luck for me, anyway) she would grow into and out of my shoe size quickly enough that anything I purchased for her in that size would be in good enough shape that I could use it after she outgrew it.  So, when she hit a size 8, I purchased a nice pair of Sorel boots for her to wear in the winter.  The next winter, they were too small for her, but still in nearly new shape.  Oh, darn (NOT!).  I then had a very nice pair of warm winter hand me up Sorel boots for myself.  :0)  I wore them for two winters before DD2 grew into them.  Following her older sister's growth pattern, DD2 wore them for one winter.  Then I got them back (re-hand me ups? lol).  Are you still with me?  The boots are four years old at this point.  Still warm, still water and snow proof, and just starting to look a little worn.  I'm still wearing them, three years later.  They've been demoted from out in public boot to barn boot, but still useful and going strong.  I wonder how many more winters I will get out of them.  The original money spent in purchasing them over a cheaper made pair has now amortized out to where I would have had to spend double or maybe even triple on buying and replacing cheapo boots for the last seven years.

Hand me downs and hand me ups are good things.  They are not just a blessing to receive, but also to give to others.  Handing on usable items to someone you know and care about gives you space in your house and warm fuzzies in your heart.  I think that makes them great things.